Monday, March 21, 2011

Second date with "Southerngent": Drinks, Flirting and Lots of Kisses

Stop, go, slow down, speed up.
Southerngent and I have definitely had a bumpy ride along our dating road.  My approach was tentative at first when I approached him.  He seemed great, but more like friend material since he was just newly initiated into the divorce club.   He’d text or call and I’d respond but not necessarily right away.   I didn't really flirt with him a lot and kept our communication friendly.   I wanted to get to know him but I wasn’t quick to jump into romantic feelings.    All of this changed after our first date when we both felt chemistry and attraction for each other.  He is an incredible man who is worth getting to know.  However, I’m taking it much more slowly than in a normal situation.
The road to getting to know each other was paved with a few speedbumps.  Life got in the way, unfortunately and legitimate reasons, family health issues and emergency travel forced us apart, yet ironically pushed us together emotionally.  We both had loved ones who had a stroke on the same exact day, so emotionally we were experiencing similar feelings.  However, travel was involved and I had to jet across the country on last minute’s notice.    We were able though to share this experience and it brought us closer.
We talked or texted every day, several times a day in fact.  More than two weeks passed by with both of us not being able to see each other.   The flirting kicked up a couple of notches and it felt right.  We were moving along in cruise control, not speeding, taking the curves slowly, proceeding with caution. 
I know I’m being intentionally cautious for two major reasons.  First, he is newly divorced, so that has orange cones and blinking yellow lights all over it.  Secondly, I’m trying to make sure I’m ready.   If this was my typical relationship pattern, I’d be behind the wheel of this new car, speeding around the turns and probably be off to the side of the road already out of gas, as usual.   
I traded in my fast sports car for a sexy sedan.  After looking back in my rearview mirror and seeing myself land up in a big ditch off the side of the road time after time, I figured out I need to slow down a bit… make sure I was ready.   I decided I should kick the tires a bit and take the car out for a test drive before I buy it and drive it off the lot.  
We have a weeknight date, planned between our kids’ calendars.   We agree to meet in a restaurant and make our plans.    The excitement  to see each other has been building and we’ve talked about wanting to make spending time together a priority from here on out.  
I was excited getting ready for our date, practically like my own personal pit crew, waxing the finish, making it shiny, polishing it.    I check under the hood and make sure its clean, the engine is revving up nicely, ready to go.    My makeup is on, hair is straightened and shiny, I’m really excited to see my man again.  I chose a casual outfit, jeans and a red sweater worn off the shoulder and my high red heels, of course.  One last look in the mirror and I can’t wait for him to see me.
As I descend the steps to the first floor, I hear the hushed voices of my son’s youth group meeting in my family room.   Before I hit the bottom step, I pulled up my off the shoulder sweater up over my shoulders, covering my shoulders and I ditched the red heels in the corner as I said goodbye to the kids.  “Have a good time, “Ms. Single Mom” my son’s teenage friends say as I leave. 
It was a warm, sunny and beautiful March evening and I felt the excitement of early spring.   I was going through my mental checklist of what we might talk about.  He texted me to let me know he had arrived.   I was crawling in rush hour traffic, the excitement to see him was building.  When I finally got there, he met me in the parking lot and greeted me with a compliment that was a cute catcall and with lots of passionate kisses.   We broke our kissing and went inside the restaurant, following our hostess up the stairs.  He teasingly and discreetly smacked my butt as I climbed the stairs in front of him.   
We were seated on the same side of the booth together annoyingly under a bright table light.  We both ordered tall draft beers and the conversation moved quickly.  We both flirted with each other and we both had smirks on our faces when the waitress came back with our beers.   She was intrusive and came back way too many times.   Southerngent and I talked about our kids, life, romance and how much we missed seeing each other.   Our hands were touching each other innocently yet the touching was having a not so innocent impact on both of us. 
The short time we had flew by making it seem much shorter than it really was.   Inside the restaurant he was careful to not be too demonstrative.    As we walked outside, it was just transitioning from daylight to darkness.  The sky was a beautiful display of oranges, pinks and yellows.   He leaned me up against my car and we kissed for several minutes, romantically.  Being aware of the people around us, we took some breaks in our kissing and giggled like teenagers until the passersby left.   He planted romantic and passionate kisses on my neck which he knows makes me crazy.    I began lightly moaning while he did this as it felt like my body was literally melting under his mouth.    A few goodnight kisses later, it was time to say goodnight which we both did reluctantly.
As we said goodbye, and I had a chance to reflect on our date, it felt good being back on the road again, foot on the accelerator and ready to go.   Maybe it was for the best that all of these traffic jams were in our way so that we could create something really lasting and get to know each other all the more. 


However, would this be our last speedbump or would it be easy driving from here on out?  You'll have to keep reading of course...


Smooches,


The Single Mom

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