Friday, September 30, 2011

First Date with Twitterguy: Drinks, Playful Conversation and Steamy Windows

After a recent broken long distance relationship, last night was a first date with someone I’d never met. We met on Twitter early in the summer, flirted a little and had a great rapport.   The timing for me was off; I was involved with someone and tried to set him up with one of my recently divorced girlfriends.  I invited him to meet up with us once when we were out getting drinks, but it didn’t work out.  She’s younger than me and really pretty, I thought they’d hit it off for some reason.
Fast forward to the present, he came back onto Twitter after a long break and now I’m available.   After catching up a little, and exchanging a few messages, the connection was still there.   He’s a smart, funny guy and couldn’t be more opposite the person I saw before him.   (For now, I’m going to call him “Twittterguy”.)  Twitterguy is a hands on kind of guy, mechanical, is a veteran and social.   Those are good things in my book, characteristics that I respect.
On the downside, I’m not sure he’s in a place to be in a “relationship” (yikes I said that scary word…)   However, I enjoyed talking to him and I wanted to keep an open mind about getting to know him and not overthink it. 
Over the past maybe week or so, he learned my real name, had my number, knew where I lived in relation to him and we talked for the first time.   We texted a lot over the week and it was friendly, funny and flirty.   He mentioned my friend and the picture I sent him of the both of us.   I apologized for her blowing him off and explained her situation.  It was really endearing when he said, “It’s ok I was really only interested in you anyway.”
Leading up to the date, I’ve been doing a lot of soul searching and writing about being happy and living life to the fullest.  I look back on my relationship with “The Reader” and how he lives an isolated life.   I think he’s addicted to television/reading and chooses these things over having a real life.   This was a startling realization to me and a peek into a very sad existence.
After I’ve had a chance to digest it, I’ve seen how that’s not how I want to live my life and have essentially challenged people who read my blog, and my followings on Twitter, Google + and Facebook to live their life, live with courage and to go for what's going to make you happy.
However, normal human insecurities were setting in as my date got closer, was I “ready” emotionally and I even tried to back up.   It occurred to me I’d be a hypocrite if I’ve been writing the past couple of weeks about living life and I ended up staying at home instead of getting back out there.   I kicked myself in the butt, and told myself it’s only one date, go out and have fun and don’t overthink it.
I had a busy day and dressed for work with a date being an afterthought.  I was dressed cute, maybe a little sexy but not vavavavoom.  I didn’t want to send the wrong message, so I was in jeans, a silky top, belted at the waist with a red belt and of course my sexy red heels.  
I left a meeting early to go to the date, and was surprised by a downpour that came out of nowhere.   I attempted to run to my car in my heels, got into my car and checked my damp hair and now running makeup.    Inside my car, it was now pouring and the drive that would have normally taken only 30 minutes to meet him now took an hour. 
It was an extremely slippery drive and traffic was moving so slowly and I kept questioning why I was doing this.   I texted him apologizing for my delay, but he was totally cool about it, and seemed more concerned about me getting there safely.
When I finally got there, we met up with each other and exchanged a quick hug.  It was hard to tell if there was a mutual attraction or not, but I knew we’d definitely enjoy talking to each other.   He was taller than I imagined and cute in person.  He made a crack about how short I am even in my high heels.  I shot him a faux mad face after he poked fun with me.
We met at a crowded and loud sports bar and had to search for a place to sit down.  Once we did, we ordered drinks and started chatting.  The conversation flowed easily and we talked about a lot of the things we’ve started talking about up until now.  We talked about our pasts, his time in the military, sports, cars, beer and movies that made us laugh. 
There was a lot of eye contact as we talked and I caught him a couple of times with his eyes wandering to my cleavage (whoops!).     We talked about both serious and funny things and it seemed like we were getting along well and flirting a little too.  I know as I was listening to him, I was wondering what he was thinking and if we would kiss or not at the end of the night.
He couldn’t decide what he wanted to order so I dared him to order whatever I chose for him, with my eyes closed and pointed randomly to a spot.  It was just a little playful challenge that he accepted and followed through on.   
We seemed to be getting along well, and about 2 hours into the night, he found a reason to put his hands over mine and hold them on the table.  It was finally the first real signal that he was attracted to me.   After that, the flirting became a little more obvious and we both exchanged a lot of smirks.  
After it was time to pay the check, we went to sit in my car and talk for a little while longer.   Walking out, of the now not so crowded restaurant, it was comforting to feel his hand on the small of my back, leading me to the door.  The rain had subsided and the night air was chilly. 
We both sat in my car and exchanged a couple of nervous laughs and lingering eye contact before our first kiss.   My head was in an awkward position and although the first kiss was nice, it seemed a little out of synch.   Luckily, kisses number 2 through maybe 100 that night seemed to get more into a groove (boom chicka wow wow). 
Our kisses became more and more passionate as we took breaks when people came back to their cars around us.    During one such break, he joked about noticing another guy’s name written on my windshield, now appearing because the windows were steamy.   It was written by a totally platonic guy friend as we were taking our kids somewhere a month or so ago.  I was so mad at him that night as he was doing it and told him to stop, but in his mischievous way snickered and continued.   (He enjoyed my text last night telling him that it did get seen in a date situation like I predicted it eventually would.)
As we talked in my car, "Twitterguy" told me how he was attracted to me from my pictures, but when he hugged me for the first time and smelled my perfume, he was done. 
It felt really great to be attractive to a new person, share a little passion with someone and enjoy an evening without feeling total regret in the morning.  It was definitely empowering and exactly what I needed to get back out there again.   I’m reasonably sure I’ll see him again but for today, it was a just fun date.  It might be just one night out, but it's a first step of living my life and looking for happiness... a whole lot better than sitting at home in my comfort zone.
The Single Mom

I hope you do something that pushes you just a little out of your comfort zone this weekend, just a little...


James said...

Two words: Yay and *wink*

OK, a few more: Told you!! I'm not just a pretty face.

Jenniffer said...

yay yay yay! SO Glad you went out there and had fun!! :D Keep them light, fun, no expectations, and build a friendship bond along with or proceeding any passion. I'm proud of you for not chickening out *smirk* lol j/k :)

Girl.. You wouldn't believe the BS I've just had last night, with a guy I've been talking to for a few weeks.. omg.. He flipped his lid and caused me to FIRMLY shut THAT door and lock it for good.. yikes!

DavidRayDog said...

mmmmm . . . love me some steamy windows!

Sounds like a lovely evening.

Anonymous said...

So glad for you! Very courageous - keep on trucking baby!